Maybe We Could Be Each Other’s Soulmates
I decided back in September to start putting myself out there more not just in the dating realm, but with friendship, as well. As I’m sure some of you have experienced firsthand, it gets harder and harder as you get older to maintain a steady circle of friends because it seems like someone is constantly getting married…having babies…moving away. When I sat back and evaluated my life seven months ago, I realized it was time to ask myself some hard questions, like “What if you never get married? Have you built enough meaningful connections to sustain a happy life, even without a significant other?” Believe me, those were NOT fun questions to confront. The thought that I might never find my person isn’t even a concept I’ve entertained up to this point. And yet, the reality is…there’s a chance it might not ever happen for me. I don’t like to admit that, but NOT admitting it and finding a way to be happy anyway would only do me more harm in the long run. So I knew upon acknowledging these difficult truths, it was time to go to work building a life for myself that I could love with or without, well…love.
One of the coolest features of Bumble (in my humble opinion) is the Bumble BFF feature. It allows you to connect with potential friends instead of potential love interests. You can sign up for Bumble and use only that function of the app whether you’re married, single, in a relationship, etc. And because of Bumble BFF, over these past seven months, I’ve developed four beautiful friendships with four beautiful ladies whose path I might have never crossed with otherwise. One of these ladies, Jessica, has become one of my best friends. She was my first Bumble BFF and we connected instantly. From the moment we first messaged, I knew we were going to be great friends. I’ve even had the opportunity to get all of my BFF’s together for group hangs and it’s been so fun connecting friends with other friends.
Around November 2016 is when I entered into an extremely difficult period in my life, and Jessica and another Bumble BFF, Katie (pictured here) were by my side the entire time. It’s amazing to look back and see what we’ve all been through in such a short period of time. Collectively we’ve experienced multiple breakups, the death of an ex, a totaled car, and a major life crash. I’ve cried with these girls, laughed with these girls, danced with them, mourned with them, celebrated with them. I truly would have been lost without them over these past few months. And I never would have known them at all had I not been brave enough to take a chance on a little dating app. It makes me think of that moment on Sex & the City when Carrie is getting ready to move to Paris and she looks at Charlotte, Samantha, and Miranda and says: “Today I had a thought. What if I had never met you?” How different my life might be right now had I not met Jessica and Katie. My life has taken me to some dark, broken places since November 2016, and yet, in the midst of it all, great beauty has blossomed. I know these girls will be in my life forever…and I can’t wait to see where our lives take us. I guess I say all this to say: If you’ve given up on friendship like you might have given up on love, DON’T. The potential to make lifelong friends is still there, even later in the game. Even at age 38. 🙂 I’m living proof. And regardless of who or what else Bumble brings my way, it has already brought me such tremendous riches in the form of these friendships. This is not just a shameless plug for Bumble. This is actually me speaking from my heart with immense gratitude that I have been blessed by these friendships at a time in my life when I needed them most.
Whether it’s Bumble BFF or volunteering joining an intramural team or putting yourself out there in some other way to meet new people…be willing to take a chance on friendship AND love. Because here’s the thing: Whether or not love ever finds you, friends will always be there. Your girls will always be there, to pick you up when you fall or dance it out when you’ve had a bad day or cheer for you when something amazing happens or cry with you when something bad happens.
Tomorrow night me and very first Bumble BFF, Jessica, will be doing a live chat on my Facebook page, answering all your questions about Bumble and Bumble BFF and sharing some of our online dating experiences and just generally doing a little girl talk. Join us at 7:30 CT!
And feel free to comment below with your thoughts about friendship in your 30’s and beyond, Bumble BFF, your favorite way to meet new people, etc.