Dash of Sass: Let’s Stop Trying to Be Right & Just Be Real

FlyingI’ve been in a bit of a creative slump lately that has definitely affected my writing and tweeting and posting. I’m not sure why, but every summer around this time, I hit a creative wall. And because I don’t really have anything brilliant to say, I stop saying anything at all. When I saw this beautifully perfect quote by Brian Andreas, it occurred to me that perhaps I don’t have to say anything brilliant. Or deep. Or astoundingly witty or inspirational or life changing. Maybe I can just say something REAL. Something transparent. Something true to me and my life right now. Maybe I can stop trying to be this source of endless positivity and just be a source of authenticity. And maybe my truth right now is that I don’t feel terribly inspired or creative and that’s okay. You see, I’m always struggling to find the balance between “Mandy” and “The Single Woman” and maybe that balance is just accepting both parts of myself…the inspirational part and the not-so-inspirational part…the part that looks for the silver lining in every situation and the part that can’t find a single speck of glitter in all the dust. Maybe by doing THAT I might just make a bigger difference in your lives than if I either pretended to be perfect or stopped writing all together because I’m not. Maybe we could stop trying to be right and perfect and pleasing together and just be who we are, however messy or uncertain or flawed we may be. Yes?

28 Responses to “ Dash of Sass: Let’s Stop Trying to Be Right & Just Be Real ”

  1. Michelle
    July 1, 2015

    Mandy, i love whatever you write about. I find myself waiting weekly for an update or new post from you. Reading about everything you go through give me comfort, it makes me not feel so alone in the world, you are REAL, Relatable and inspirational . We all go through a little creativity block, if its in our personal lives, working environment or even our relationships. In the end you always motivate us or keep us ‘the readers’ coming back for more. I for one love your stories,
    And posts . I find comfort and wisdom in them! Keep being you because we love you either way!


  2. K'Lynn
    July 1, 2015

    Thank u so much for sharing of yourself with us ladies, u are amazingly beautiful through ur posts I get to read…

    • Alana
      July 1, 2015

      Mandy, you are inspirational even when you don’t think you’re being inspirational…showing all sides of yourself, in any situation…it is what makes us relatable! I am sorry you’re in a slump (I am also very familiar) but i know it will pass in due time, God’s time, and for whatever reason this period is necessary…sending you so many positive vibes, xo…P.S: keep posting, if you desire to, but also embrace periods of creative reprieve, if necessary.

  3. Ayanda
    July 1, 2015

    You have no idea how much this page changed the way I feel about myself. I remember the first day I read it, it ddnt make much sense to me. But I feel better now knowing I have a place where I can get inspiration from. Please continue inspiring u are a blessing for women…

  4. July 1, 2015

    Good for you for owning both parts of yourself. I came to realize this truth myself in March, when I wasn’t feeling particularly inspired myself and wanted to stop writing too. That would be crazy though, because writing is my passion and was the thing that pulled me out of my slump. I too, also struggle with both parts of myself. I too pride myself on being a mostly happy-go-lucky inspirational person, but I’m not that way every day and have to work at it. I wasn’t brought up that way, and I suffer from generalized anxiety disorder. So, I don’t always have good writing days or just good days, period. We all have to come to terms with and love every facet of ourselves and every emotion that we feel eventually. By the way, your posts are always inspiring, REAL, and authentic to me. Keep up the great work.

  5. July 1, 2015

    Thank you so much Mandy, this blog has come right on time

  6. Suzanne
    July 1, 2015

    Sounds good to me!

    • Kik
      July 2, 2015

      Yes!!exactly this i was talking about yesterday! people always feel the need to be someone else but the true beauty in people is their truth and honesty and authenticity – and if we didn’t try to hide it so often and do what we think others want to hear, maybe the world would be more beautiful and communication would be stronger and people would be more self aware!! That post is one of the best posts uve done so far thank u!!

  7. tiffany lee
    July 1, 2015

    I love reading your posts and I agree with Alana’s sentiments. πŸ™‚ Real is relatable, and human! As a single woman, I swing between being content and freaking out that I’ll die an old cat lady (even though I know I’m pretty fabulous). I’m notoriously optimistic and refrain from being what I would term a “downer”. However, we can still be real about a situation that sucks, while being optimistic about what is to come. I don’t think you could stop being inspirational if you tried… Thanks for being transparent! My brain is totally fried if it makes you feel better. Hopefully rest will improve that, or there is always coffee. πŸ™‚

  8. Tiera
    July 1, 2015

    I love this. You are such an incredible, authentic person. Thank you for everything you post!

  9. Jenn
    July 1, 2015

    God is good!!! Thank you for sharing that, and for being so authentic and real! That is exactly what I needed to hear. Thank you for putting yourself out there! Amen sista!

  10. Maya
    July 2, 2015


    You’ve hit the nail on the head. Being authentic is so much more powerful than putting on the false happy face. This has been something I’ve battled my entire 47 years. I am finding true happiness by embracing my entire self, as flawed as it is. Now that I have stopped trying to please everyone in my life, I’m finding true fulfillment. Keep doing what you’re doing, being who you are on good days and bad. That is inspirational. Thank you.

  11. Donna
    July 2, 2015

    Perfect timing. Thanks for giving me permission to just be!

  12. Kim
    July 2, 2015

    Plus when you are real it definitely helps me if not everyone realize that people who are as talented and delightful like you are not always ‘feelin it’ ‘always get it right’ and it makes me feel like we are not that far apart in likeness. Which definitely helps my walk with God as well. But since I read your books I already know you are as real as it gets. You keeping going Mandy. Share away. Life isn’t always perfect…we all know it… and it’s nice to know it happens to all of us. It’s what brings us together.

  13. Neeka
    July 2, 2015


    I agree with Alana. Even reading this entry was inspiring. I always look forward to your writing. You are awesome and inspire so many of us each day, even when you think you are not. Lots of love!

  14. July 2, 2015

    That was so vulnerable and transparent Mandy. On our way to walking into God’s flow of His perfect will for our lives, we will go thru standstills that will purge us, break us and realign us to where we truly need to be. But at His perfect will, we need to be is His child receiving unconditional love and dicipline where needed. It’s not complicated just real. That’s where I am. This is the place where Father speaks of His secret and personal will for our lives. You have been very inspiring, but will also be leading women to the only source of balance which is our Heavenly Father. I hope this helps. God Bless Your Next Level!! Love, Giselle Gras from Miami

  15. mattie
    July 2, 2015

    girl ,you just keep being Mandy, whatever that means for that day .nobody is perfect but one .we ALL aspire to be like him ,but living in an imperfect world we fall short everyday. there is grace for that day, that day alone .we love you just as you are .dont be to hard on yourself ,you dont have to please anyone but G-d ,that is a fact .we love your advice and I look forward to hearing from you each time ,but if you aint feeling it ,you just dont .just BE .BE still, BE quite ,maybe it is a time for rest and refreshing for you .we ALL need a break from time to time .no sorries girl. grab you a cup of hot tea ,a good book and just have some quite time alone and breath πŸ™‚ xoxox

  16. Kim R
    July 2, 2015

    Still trying to embrace my singleness. Some days that is no problem. Other days I wish I were still married (husband died 4 years ago). I like when you write. Even when there is no brilliant message, it is nice to know that you are there supporting single women through the ups and downs. Just be you. It is more than enough.

  17. July 2, 2015

    True connection comes from being your authentic self! Cheers to you for being open and vulnerable. Keep up the amazing work. We can all relate – on the inspiring and not so inspiring days. HUGS to you!

  18. Wondering
    July 2, 2015

    So true, Mandy. SO true!!! Thank you.

  19. Melissa
    July 2, 2015

    Mandy you are wonderful just as you are! Never change! We have all been there. In fact, I’m there now! Keep believing! xo

  20. monica
    July 3, 2015

    I love this book . I read it from cover to cover. I used alot of these phase for topics and also to my life in general.. s/o to mandy.. you’re a wonderful woman of God =. can’t wait to ssee what your next book will be like.. God bless.

  21. July 6, 2015

    @MissMandyHale I guess you are also experiencing the writer’s block, or isn’t that what they call it? I believe it is one of the many things that makes you human . . . I love the good work you are doing with The Single Woman platform, God bless you. Hoping you get your muse back soon because I am an avid reader of your posts. XXX

  22. Rae
    July 6, 2015

    I needed to hear this today. Thank you for sharing. I am messy, I am uncertain at this time, I do fall short daily and just to hear that it is okay not to always be “ON” is reassuring. I am searching for God’s bigger plan for my life and it is hard to see my way right now; I know He is still there.

  23. Erica
    July 13, 2015

    Aaahhhh! I just love you! You, being yourself, not even saying anything at all, still inspire us!

    Blessings xoxo

    P.S. Apparently I slow down a bit in the Summer, too! Is it because it’s the Summer? πŸ™‚ Hmmm…

  24. July 13, 2015

    This is just in time… This is what I’m feeling right now! Thanku Mandy for inspiring me always! God bless you more!

    “…I don’t have to say anything brilliant. Or deep. Or astoundingly witty or inspirational or life changing. Maybe I can just say something REAL. “

  25. jodi
    July 27, 2015

    I’m inspired by the simplicity of your truth. My sister and I commited to progress and not perfection for 2015. Sometimes progress looks like rolling out of bed and at other times it’s consistently working out for weeks. Thank you for telling the truth.

  26. Nichola
    September 24, 2015

    Every night I lay in bed I read your articals
    I never seem to have anything to say these days
    I am an upside down mess some days and think it’s better to shut up haha can’t seem to get through a week without 4 meltdowns
    Thank you for inspiring love your daily tweets too uplifting lady .. Great to have you around

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Something wonderful is on the horizon
Life doesn’t always look the way we want it to look. In Mandy’s upcoming book, Turn Toward the Sun: Releasing What If and Embracing What Is, you’ll find encouragement to live in the moment, sit with your experiences, and trust God with the unknown.
Preorder from Baker Book House for 40% off and free shipping!*
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Something wonderful is on the horizon
Turn Toward the Sun CoverLife doesn’t always look the way we want it to look. In Mandy’s upcoming book, Turn Toward the Sun: Releasing What If and Embracing What Is, you’ll find encouragement to live in the moment, sit with your experiences, and trust God with the unknown.
Preorder from Baker Book House for 40% off and free shipping!*
*US shipping only