Dash of Sass: Ask For What You Need
Sometimes we’re afraid to ask for what we want from people and relationships and friendships because we’re afraid the other person will leave if we do. But part of being true to yourself is being willing to speak what’s on your heart in an honest and bold way, regardless of how the other person reacts. I’m not suggesting you make unreasonable demands and project unrealistic expectations onto everyone you know…I’m suggesting that you tactfully and clearly and lovingly convey your needs and wants to the people in your life who matter, because if they truly love you, they’re going to want to show up for you. And if they’re not currently showing up for you, they need to know about it. All relationships that are not two-way streets are dead end roads. If you’re working your butt off to stay in someone’s life who never makes an effort to stay in yours, eventually you’re going to grow resentful and frustrated and even bitter about it, and the relationship will self-destruct anyway. So isn’t it better to just honestly communicate to someone how you feel and give them a chance to respond in kind?
So so true! I recently bit the bullet and asked someone to get together. I don’t know that we had ever had a conversation the two of us, but it was so refreshing to connect with someone new! I had been thinking about doing it for a year, and after our two hour conversation, I can’t understand why I waited so darn long!
I absolutely agree! Your words are so meaningful to me! Asking for what I want is a lot easier now that I know and believe my self worth. It’s made me not settle for anything less. And your book has made it easier for me to realize that! I finally feel fulfilled in a relationship now that I’m clear in communicating what I need from it and he is beyond happy to show up and give that to me. He knows I’m getting exactly what I need from him and it makes him feel amazing to do that. 🙂 thank you for everything you do!