Ten Reasons to Give Yourself Permission to Write Your Own Fairytale

FairytaleMy new book I’ve Never Been to Vegas But My Luggage Has: Mishaps & Miracles on the Road to Happily Ever After came out on March 11th…and I can honestly say I’ve never been prouder of anything I’ve written in my life. It’s bold. It’s raw. It’s REAL. It’s my story, uncensored. And I honestly think it’s a story that all women, single or not, will find glimpses of themselves in.

The #1 message I wanted to convey with this book is this: Happily Ever After is not a destination. It’s a way of life. It’s a CHOICE you make, this ‘being happy’ thing, and it has nothing whatsoever to do with your relationship status.

There is no set way your journey through life is supposed to look. Your career path might change without notice. You might be redirected to a place you never dreamed you would go. And you might find your forever in the eyes of the last person you ever thought you’d fall in love with. So stay open to detours, and surprises, and unexpected adventures, because if I’ve learned anything in my 35 years of being alive…it’s that life loves to take our breath away. 🙂

So here they are: The Top Ten Reasons to Give Yourself Permission to Write Your Own Fairytale, also known as my Top Ten Favorite Quotes from Never Been to Vegas. Share them. Live them. Add your own to the list. And remember that while your luggage might not always get to the right place at the right time…you always do.

1. ThePast

2. Journey

3. 1

4. Overthinker

5. MeantToBe

6. 17

7. CarrieBig

8. Movie

9. 10

10. Fairytale

***Bonus Image! Here’s one of my favorite quotes from The Single Woman’s Breakup Bootcamp e-book that you’re going to get for FREE if you order #NeverBeenToVegas by March 15th!

BreakUpBootcamp

 

Which quote is your favorite? How are you writing your own fairytale?!? Sound off in the comment below for a chance to win a free signed copy of #NeverBeenToVegas!

69 Responses to “ Ten Reasons to Give Yourself Permission to Write Your Own Fairytale ”

  1. cristelle
    March 11, 2014

    The last one..had a recent guy who left and said its his job and his job is his life..crushed me

    • Mattie
      March 11, 2014

      the last one too got to me .mine left for an ex-wife that he had been divorced from for a year and a half and lived in a different state. totaly shocked me .we talked everyday. he was so kind and respectful .we had a good time when we were together.he was a really good and decent man.thought I had finally “out of all the frogs: found the “one” we had planned a vacation this Spring .he changed his job to be closer to me, told me he truly cared for me ,then over a very nice sunday lunch, he said he wasnt over his exwife and was sorry to hurt me .WOW!!!!! NEVER heard from him again!!!!!!!!so I am trying to listen with my heart what you have said : he wasnt the one for me. G-d has someone out there that wont leave me.im cont… to believe in happy endings. hope that helps someone else today that might be thinking :what did I do .you did nothing. it is on them ,not you .move on .easier said than done .I know !!!!!!

    • March 12, 2014

      Mandy girl I’m inlove with the #never been to Vegas#’ it dislike a statement of liberation. Calling all women to let go and lice life. This is totally motivating. I remember when I walked away from my ex it was these quotes that motivated me to do what was best for me. I realised that clinging to him was damaging me emotionally, it wasn’t a healthy situation. I realise I love myself enough to let go and start over its not so bad. Keep up the good work you’re truly a work of art. Your gift is a blessing to all of us females. Thank you Mandy Hale. I can confidently walk in my single woman heels

    • March 12, 2014

      Mandy girl I’m inlove with the #never been to Vegas#’ it is like a statement of liberation. Calling all women to let go and live life. This is totally motivating. I remember when I walked away from my ex it was these quotes that motivated me to do what was best for me. I realised that clinging to him was damaging me emotionally, it wasn’t a healthy situation. I realise I love myself enough to let go and start over its not so bad. Keep up the good work you’re truly a work of art. Your gift is a blessing to all of us females. Thank you Mandy Hale. I can confidently walk in my single woman heels

    • Brooke
      March 16, 2014

      I relate to every single one of those. I myself being 35 years of age and meeting several “toads” that have all taught me lessons about myself and how to pick myself up and start a new chapter each and every single time it happens, In these moments i really have met several fairy godmothers, its the honest truth. Ive been in several relationships where in the past I tried molding myself to be what THEY wanted or thought I may have wanted. When I look back I am certainly glad that I did not ever settle. I always assumed that everyone was meant to be with someone and get married have children and a career. That doesn’t seem to be the case anymore. I am still a strong woman trying to find her way in life and I keep on exploring new options. I am currently surrounded by so much love and friendship in my life that if someone cannot except me and my goals in life I can certain live without them. It gets a little bit lonely at times and perhaps one day I will meet a special someone but it had got to be for me, they have to accept MY lifestyle, MY fitness goals and MY shortcomings..till that comes along and I can support them as much as they do me I will do just fine with my loving friends and family by my side.. Life is an adventure and I certainly have the heart of an adventurer, perhaps not the finances but I LIVE. I make the best out of what I have and certainly hope to succeed in fulfilling many of them. I am very excited to find your book and read it as I think I will relate in many many ways.. I am thankful for stumbling across your fb page and becoming a fan! Congratulations on your book and your future endeavors.

    • Sarah
      July 18, 2014

      #4…Actually I’m struggling with this right now. Overthinking is really getting me down. Ugh!

  2. March 11, 2014

    In a nutshell quote #10 resonates with me to the core. The magical (and not so magical) moments that have taught me never to give up on myself . It was hard for me to wrap my brain around when coupled with life and love. I am learning it was ok to love them, but I have to love me more.

  3. sophia kazembe
    March 11, 2014

    my favourite quote is the last quote number 10.been through alot but am growing stronger by each day.

    thanks mandy!

  4. March 11, 2014

    My favorite is the #9 “Even in the midst of my biggest, most explosive crash landings, I’ve never given up hope in happy endings”. I always believe that each of us has that someone truly meant for us. By being optimistic, by being positive and keeping my faith on this, this is how I write my own fairytale. I always believe that God always creates happy endings. We just need to be patient because everything is beautiful in His time. 🙂

  5. […] To commemorate her latest book being released today, why not follow this link and read even more excerpts from Mandy’s book “I’ve Never Been To Vegas, But My […]

  6. Mattie
    March 11, 2014

    well ,guess I sent my comment to the moon .lol not sure where it went .anyway to recap ,was just thanking you for your wisdom beyond your years.the last one really inspired me and hopefully will get from my head to my heart that: you are right, they are NOT the one for you ,if they leave. someone that truly cares or loves you,DOESNT leave you.also I to will NEVER give up on a “happy ending” what ever that looks like for me and my Journey. thank you Mandy for your wisdom and inspiration. sure needed that today 🙂

  7. Joy
    March 11, 2014

    I looove #10!
    I’m so glad to finally be at the place that I believe in myself~I alone, am good enough!! I don’t need a man to make me happy~but still hoping that Prince Charming-for all of us-will show up sooner rather than later 😉 But in the meantime~I’m enjoying the journey & can’t wait to read more of your great, inspiring advice in your book!!!

  8. Kristy Lynn
    March 11, 2014

    My favorite quote is, “Even in the midst of my biggest, most explosive crash landings, I’ve never given up hope in happy endings!” I have been through so much in my life, from being a single mom who was never married to finally marrying at age 33 but being separated for most of my marriage up til the day my husband passed away when he was only 45, and I was only 37. Now at 39 I am once again single and raising my two teenage daughters alone. Through all of this though I still hold onto the hold of happy endings! Whether or not my happy ending includes a loving man of God is yet to be seen but I have learned to embrace wherever I am at in my life, for now I am enjoying the time I have to spend with my girls, enjoying this stage in their lives, and enjoying who they are becoming. I am learning to embrace who I am and letting God do His work in me so that when I meet someone special I am the best me I can be. It takes two healthy and happy people who are dependent on God to make a relationship centered in Him. I am embracing this stage in my life and enjoying the little things along the way!

  9. Donna
    March 11, 2014

    I have just recently found your site…It came at a time I was just coming out of a relationship that I thought was going to last. 🙂 I pick #7 . You give me inspiration to take a breath and keep moving forward Mandy, and I thank you for that. Keep writing and we will keep reading 🙂

  10. Kelly McClain
    March 11, 2014

    Mandy, your wisdom, insight, and compassion are certainly needed and appreciated by so many. Thank you for all that you do. I’m at the end of a brief relationship that started out so promisingly, but ultimately was not what God wanted for either of us. Not devastating to me, thankfully, but sad and disappointing nonetheless. I am not willing to give up on my Happy Ending either. I don’t believe that God would put all this love in our hearts if He didn’t have someone special for us to share it with. Have a great day!

  11. March 11, 2014

    Right now I’m hearbroken. I hurt the person I loved because of my own insecurities and being hurt in my previous relationships,now he doesn’t wanna forgive me,it’s still new for me to take the last quote,I don’t wanna believe that it’s over,I can’t believe it. I loved him & he loves me.

    • Jen
      March 23, 2014

      I think it’s harder to be in the place of not wanting to let go, as soon as u come to terms with letting go of him, because he left, because he wasn’t man enough to stick it out… U free your mind. It’s easier when u realize it’s over.

    • Deanna Mobley
      April 9, 2014

      Quote #7 was my favorite. I’m 35 and coming out of a 17 yearmarriage that I thought no matter what trials we face and how many times we hurt each I still thought we would make it. Coming to realize that my husband I no longer going to be my husband is bringing me down and I have learned that I cannoy change him and he cannot change me but Iif our love for each other I the real forever deal then we would want tonchange ourselves for each other. I have started seeing a man who has taught me that love doesn’t grow itself but that we have to choose to make it grow or it will dwindle down and die like a plant but we must decide ourself to work our love and feelings for our person daily and be encouraging and supportive all the time for love to be forever. Im still learning how to get past my failures from being stubborn and non supportive to my husband out of choosing to treat him how I felt he treated me but I am also learning from a new love how to choose to love unconditionally regardless of imperfections! Thank you Mandy for your Iinspirations!

  12. March 11, 2014

    I love your writing, Mandy! Life is truly unpredictable, isn’t it? At 26 I never thought I’d be where I was now… Quitting my career to find what makes me happy. And learning that relationships and time spent with people is worth so much more than some amazing paycheck! I was raised to go to college and find a 9-5 job but in all honesty, what a boring and exhausting life that was! That was all holding me back from finding the true me. Sometimes you need to listen to your heart and just go with your gut feeling. Life started for me in my later 20s and I’d never go back to who I was before. Thank you for sharing and keeping me motivated to be the real me!

  13. ehiremen
    March 11, 2014

    7,9 and the Bonus one but i must say all the quotes just made me feel better about my life,i can’t give hope for happy endings, thank u so much for your courage to share your story it has been a great encouragement to me, and i think i would need that breakup bootcamp book, my life almost feels like i wasted time on guys….. thank you mandy for your post especially the ones on facebook

  14. March 11, 2014

    Number 4 – I’m learning to trust God’s plans and not let my thoughts and doubts destroy the dream he has for my life.

  15. March 11, 2014

    Number 10 for me. I sure have met a few toads but I am feeling stronger than ever before. The quotes are inspiring and young women like myself need to be reminded that being happy is a choice. Definitely going to order these very inspirational books.

  16. Jazmine
    March 11, 2014

    For me, the second & fourth one are my favorite. They are also my biggest battles All the time, I drive myself crazy with thoughts about how my life isn’t how I think it should be, what I should or shouldn’t say because of fear of unacceptable and judgement and fear that I will never measure up . I’m still learning how to beat this once and for all, but I wanted to say thank you from the bottom of my heart for simply giving a slice of hope that maybe, just maybe, there’s an unforseen God-ordained duty that only I can fulfill.

  17. Zeshly
    March 11, 2014

    I’ve been trying to get thru over a breakup for over 3 years, he told me there’s someone else and he left. I was shattered, broken and up to this day….I am still crying. Thank u Mandy for these quotes, especially the last one. If they left, they aren’t the one for u.

    • Jen
      March 23, 2014

      3 years? Don’t waste your life girl… Let go, move on…. Be the best u, you can be to the man of your dreams!! You’re destined to find a love better then you can ever imagine.

  18. MR Rodillas
    March 11, 2014

    I can so relate to quote #5… But now I know that whatever happens God has a plan for me and I can say I’m enjoying the journey and never been ao excited!

    Thank you very much Mandy for sharing your talents and blessings! Kudos!

  19. Mari Lerdo
    March 11, 2014

    Well I think they go together #8 & #11 we met on November started talking/dating I taught I had finally met the one. But as ytime progress I realized that I was always the one running after him & when I try making a point of how I felt he would always blame me till I started questioning myself. Then we got in a fight didn’t heard from him till Valentine’s Day & he ignored me the next day. Then out of nowhere he txted he was seeing someone else. Thats how I found you & thanks to you I realized that I was not the problem he was. I’m more confident on myself I have a one true love witch is God. & I’m waiting for my happily ever after by making my dreams come true.

  20. Julie
    March 11, 2014

    The last one. I’m going through a divorce after a 20 year marriage. I need to tell myself that he wasn’t the one, even though it’s hard.

    • Amanda
      June 5, 2014

      Thanks for sharing. I just got a divorce and found Mandy over the last year. I found Divorce Care bible study through my church. Hope you look into it. God’s peace.

  21. Lori
    March 12, 2014

    There is a part of each one that touched me… But the bottom line… God has my life in his hands … I’m lonely… God knows that … I want to get married again… God knows that too… But I also know his timing and will is perfect….so as the daughter of the king…. I wait …for I’m a prize to be won!!!!

  22. Kandi
    March 12, 2014

    #7 and 10 are my favorites. I ordered 4 copies of this book for me and three of my single friends. I can’t wait to get it! I sure have kissed a lot of frogs and I’ve learned so much from the experiences I’ve had. I know God has a plan for me and I know it’s going to be good and I’ve finally reached a point where I can say I’m ok and I’m ok with waiting.

  23. March 12, 2014

    I just wanna say dat, dis inspires me a lot, to be a better woman and to make sound decisions as I grow. *lovies*

  24. Cherisse
    March 12, 2014

    The last two!!! LOVE LOVE!! Fits me so well..thank you Mandy Hale! And God Bless you!

  25. Brynn
    March 12, 2014

    Mattie – I know how you feel. I was in love with a man who was separated from his wife. We were friends first and became very close. He wanted to be with me as well. I waited a year and half for him (wife had divorce issues and then killed herself), and in the end – he ran off to be with a woman who was a few years older than his son. It hurts but it has made me stronger and made me realize that I shouldn’t sacrifice my goals and dreams for him. I am happily living out those goals and dreams. The right man will catch up with you. Just don’t give up.

    • Mattie
      March 24, 2014

      awww ,to Brynn. thank you that was so sweet .and I am so sorry for your lose as well. and back @ ya .the right person is out there for you too .never give up .hold out . never forget you have a happy ending whatever that might look like for you.xoxox

  26. Cheron
    March 13, 2014

    I really love your quotes, and really have taken them on board. Yep, I am single, but enjoying my life. If HE comes along all well and good. I will still have one hell of a time though. I especially love #10 and the bootcamp one. If will definitely be sharing with my friends.

  27. March 14, 2014

    I love your quotes… i hope i could see your book here in philippines soon.

  28. Monica
    March 14, 2014

    I love all the quotes but the last one really hits home. About a year ago my husband of 12 yrs decided he loved an d hook up from years ago so he met up with her and decided she was the love of his life. He left our home, 2 kids and myself for her. She turned out not to be what she said and pretty much ruined his life. Through all if it God has been my rock & my relationship with Him has grown. I know this was all part of Gods plan for us. My ex was not faithful prior to this either so I know deep down and with prayer that we are not meant to be even with our history. BUT I haven’t given up on real true love. God has the perfect man for me he is just waiting for the right time! I can’t wait to read your book!!

  29. March 14, 2014

    #6 And #7. My heart is broken. But I know I need to move on. I am only going to be sadder the longer I hold on.
    God says let him go.
    Thank you for all you do and share.

    • Jen
      March 23, 2014

      The more we obey God the sooner our blessings arrive!! This was hard for me too… It’s still hard but I know God told me to let go of the man I love… I know if I’m obedient God will bless my future beyond my dreams

  30. Ngoni
    March 14, 2014

    Number 2. “This I know for sure. Your life, your path, your journey…isn’t going to look like everyone else’s. And that’s okay.” It took me awhile to realize and accept this. Now looking back, I am kinda glad my life doesn’t look like the majority. I think my side of the grass is pretty green, so I’ll stay here!

  31. Patrice
    March 15, 2014

    Both 1 & 10, Because truly my past did not last but I Did. I can and I am celebrating that fact from this moment on. No my Prince charming hadn’t found me, but I do know how to rescue myself with the help of God. I have had plenty godmother and they all have made deposits in me to help me become the woman I am today. A woman who never gives up!

  32. Jewel Oi
    March 16, 2014

    My favourite is number 5!! Surrender, such a powerful word. Beautiful, Mandy! ** hugs **

  33. […] you find yourself in a similar place, let me know about it in the comments, and check out Ten Reasons to Give Yourself Permission to Write Your Own Fairytale by Mandy Hale, The Single […]

  34. Jenn
    March 16, 2014

    The quote about over thinking. I have had that problem in the past! It is so difficult not to when my personality is very emotional, and I am verbally needy. I have always wanted to know what someone was feeling it thinking…..

    • Sarah Jane
      May 20, 2014

      You hit the nail on the head about being verbally needy. I was just telling a male friend last night that I can’t stand the silence and not knowing what he was thinking/feeling. I always feel that the silence is a reflection of me…when in reality some people just don’t open up like I do, and I need to learn that is okay. I wear my emotions on my sleeves, unless I’m hurt…and at that point I shut down. All these quotes are very thought provoking and inspires somebody to do some soul searching.

  35. Beth
    March 16, 2014

    Left an abusive relationship, in my 60s when I should be retiring. Starting over again….single again!

  36. Sara
    March 16, 2014

    Love #5. Still trying to work on figuring out what God has planned for me…and if that means never getting past date #3 with a guy and being single, then I will embrace it. I am learning to be much more independent because of it.

  37. March 16, 2014

    #9 “Even in the midst of my biggest, most explosive crash landings, I’ve never given up hope in happy endings”. 

    I may have not dated any one for the past three years, and there are times when I feel lonely,friend weddings, baby showers, working my ass off at work and skipping dinner, and knowing the wedding of the guy who said “im not ready for a relationship” my ass… i still believe that i will meet THE ONE. He will accept my flaws and temper, and will always think of me as his first place girl. I am working hard to achieve the life I love and also becomr the woman of my dream, while I believe THE ONE is also working towards his goals. We will meet each other when we are both ready and happy with our lives, nothing can stop us when it happens.

    Love you Mandy, xoxo Kiyora from Singapore

  38. Batho
    March 16, 2014

    If there’s one thing I would love to see from us ladies is a firmly built character not in any man but in the Lord. We fail to realise our self worth because we are so busy trying to become what we think man want, and tend to forget that there is a story written about each one of us (you being the main character).
    Mandy I thank God for you, and I thank you for realising and responding to your calling to empower women around the world. I pray the good Lord keeps you and increases you, blesses you with your Boaz, (if He has already done that, we thank Him even more).

  39. D
    March 16, 2014

    #1. When my past looks me in the face they have no idea who they are about to meet. Like the book. Love the story. Can’t wait to see where you go next.

  40. Dana K
    March 16, 2014

    #5 and #9….I’m 35 and never been married. Totally not where I expected to be at this point in my life. I was popular in high school and college and assumed I’d marry right out of college and be a soccer mom with 2-3 kids. Not so much. I spent years wondering what was wrong with me, wondering why everyone else was getting the “happily ever after” I was longing for. After all of my crashes, disappointments, and unmet desires, I keep pushing forward with my faith in God and His perfect timing. Thank you for being an inspiration and reminding me to just enjoy the journey!

    • Sisi
      May 20, 2014

      Hang in there, you’re probably closer than you think to your prince. Age aint nothing but a number, God is not limited by your age or how popular you were. Cheer up, never settle for less than the BEST and the BEST is coming your way in Jesus name, Amen!

  41. Maegan
    March 16, 2014

    The one about toads spoke is my fave. I sure have met a lot of toads. The last one (four years ago) taught me a life-changing lesson that I wouldn’t trade for the world! Because of that toad, I began a journey out of insecurity and into my role as a princess, the daughter of the King. I have stopped seeing myself as a little girl from the slums pretending to be a princess and realized that I am a princess pretending to be a little girl from the slums. It’s time to get back to the castle and take my throne!

  42. Madison Rawley
    March 17, 2014

    That’s how I’m writing my own fairy tale.

  43. Mary
    March 18, 2014

    I’m new and I’m intrigued. But I am skeptical and definitely bitter. I’m just shy of 46 years old and hope is gone…it left for good after one last oomph that lead to a cross-country move and a resolve to change my loneliness and financial destitution. I thought, “surely this isn’t all there is for me, right God?” Never married, no children, highly educated yet swimming in debt & devoid of any retirement savings. I’m here to tell you that being single in middle age isn’t fabulous. Not at all. But there is still an ember that refuses to burn out. I just am no longer sure how to stoke it. I’ve tried it all, really. Even letting God blow his mighty breath. I’m still cold and in the dark, no fire here. I will continue reading and it is comforting to see that I am not the only one who has been treated poorly, and been disappointed by life. Good luck & love to all.

  44. Newborn
    March 21, 2014

    Thank you for your inspiring words. I have been in a relationship for 5 years. We went through our ups and downs like every couple. We things were great I was blessed with the news that I was pregnant. He was nice and lovable until the last few months of our pregnancy when I decided of find our cat a new home. He was devastated and decided to give me the silent treatment while I was 7 months pregnant. Our baby was born premie at 8 months and he behaved to good by helping me a lot at the hospital. We brought home our. Newborn. I noticed he was glued to his cell phone and began to question myself why? So I logged on to our tmobile website and found this number he was texting 5,000 times during the last 4 months. It took me a few days to process and I confronted him about it. Turns out he was talking to someone else and told me he didn’t love. Me anymore. That he was going to continue with me be us of his daughter. I immediately ended the engagement and now I feel so hurt with a newborn baby I have to start over. I’m in shock because I didn’t expect this from him. His family is saddened and also hurt over the situation. I’m in the middle of the separation and can’t begin to tell u how hard this is. I even moved to Florida for him and have no one here so I don’t know if to move back to NYC where I’m from or stay here where I’m settled. My baby deserves the best but I’m in an emotional roller coaster and ur words have calmed me but can’t help feeling this hurt. Thank you for ur kind words I will read it everyday and help me get through this alone. Sorry for the big essay but I’m full of so much sadness.

    • Quana
      March 27, 2014

      I can feel your pain!!! I moved and uprooted my.daughter.to move.from.one state to the state her father now lives at… look at it like this your journey with him has taken it’s course.. you have a beautiful baby and that’s all that matter!!!! His lost your Gain!!!!! You.do not need him in your life because he is the father of.your.child…. I a single.mom of 2 amazing girls… and they are the reason I fight hard… I had to realize everyone who starts out with you.won’t end.up with you in the end!!!! God.will give you the strength to move on and be a wonderful mom to your baby!!!!! Be bless and know God got you!!!!!

  45. Mike
    March 22, 2014

    I’m a little embarrassed to write a post here as a guy but I can identify with a lot of the comments I’ve read and the raw pain that’s been expressed. I found out about this blog after watching Mandy on the 700 Club a few days ago. I looked up the blog mainly because of what she shared about “Mr. E” and the experience of going to the jewelry store and looking at diamond rings only to have her heart crushed. It’s awfully painful to feel like you’ve been led on or played with emotionally. I went through something similar and am still working through the pain. I was head over heels in love with Julie and felt like God had brought her into my life as a healing to my soul after my former wife left me 5 years previously for another man. I courted Julie for 3 months in 2011 and believed God had brought us together. We prayed together every time we went out and I pledged to God that I would honor Him by the way I honored her. We seemed to draw very close emotionally and shared a lot (we also honored God in our physical relationship). Then suddenly she broke up with me, saying she wasn’t ready for a relationship and needed to devote herself to raising her 2 teenage children (she had been married for 18 years and divorced after her husband left her for another woman with whom he had a long-term affair). I was devastated but I let her go and gave her space and time, hoping that things would change in the future. In January of 2012 she contacted me after her father died and we talked for a long time. She thanked me for always being there for her and invited back into her life, though she still wasn’t ready for a relationship at that point. Over the next 3 months, she couldn’t seem to make up her mind if she wanted me in her life or not. I finally got sick of dealing with it and I stopped coming around to see her. She called me in April of 2012 and asked what was wrong. She told me she cared greatly for me and continued to care greatly for me. I thought she was telling me that she wanted me back in her life and that I had the opportunity to win her heart back. I began to pursue her earnestly again. I went by the pharmacy where she worked to see her regularly. I left notes in her car and treats I knew she liked. I told her often how pretty she looked, how pretty her hair looked and how beautiful her eyes were. When she was struggling financially, I left her a card with money in it to help her out. She thanked me and said how happy she was I was in her life. Somewhere around this time she met Joe, a guy from her church. I had no idea. I came around the pharmacy for weeks continuing to do the same things, pursuing her to win her heart back. She never told me about Joe. Weeks later I accidentally found out on Facebook. I was totally devastated emotionally. That was in July of 2012. When I stopped coming around the pharmacy, Julie sent me a text message and asked me what was wrong. When I told her I saw her Facebook page, she never responded. I sent her an email 3 months later to try and get some closure. I told her how deeply wounded and devastated I was and she told me she was sorry that I misunderstood her kindness to me. She said she was only being kind to me by telling me how much she cared for me, etc. That made the pain even worse. Today she and Joe are married and I’m still working through the pain. There’s never been any closure or healing. We live in a small town and sometimes I still see her, which makes it worse. It feels like I’m never going to recover from the pain and heartbreak. I’m lonely but I don’t want to open my heart again to anyone. The one consolation is knowing without question that the Lord is using this for good in my life. Nothing is ever wasted in our lives as Christians and certainly something as devastating as this is God’s tool in my life to help me be more like Him. Paul talked about knowing Jesus through the fellowship of suffering. I understand that fellowship a lot better now than I ever could have before. One benefit is having a deeper understanding of the pain others go through. My heart went out to many of those who posted on this page. Thanks to everyone who read this and for allowing me to share in this blog that is designed for the ladies. May the Lord continue to bless the fruit of Mandy’s labors in His Name.

  46. rachel
    March 26, 2014

    God bless you. You’re a blessing to this generation.

  47. Quana
    March 27, 2014

    Wow!!!!! It is amazing to read some of the stories posted and being able to relate to the majority of them. I am getting out of a toxic relationship that I was in for 15 years. needless to say, it has been hard but through God all things are possible!!!!! I thank God.for my journey in life because it has taught me so many things about myself! I now can say I love myself, my purpose will be fill filled, I will have renewness of life, and the man that finest a wife(me) will find a good hearted person…. I had to forgive self, and that is the hardest thing.to do but once forgiveness takes place out is the best feeling on the world!!!!!! I want.to tell each and every one of you to hang in there and thank God for heartbreaks because without them we will never know what true love is suppose to be!!!!!! Be bless ladies and 2014 is our year, for new life, prosperity, and purpose!!!!!

  48. Crimsonjai
    March 27, 2014

    I follow you on fb and twitter. We talked about letting go. It’s been so hard the past few months. Even tho it was only 2 years he was so good to me. Yet he always said he didn’t think he could love me the way I wanted to be loved. Said he needed time to himself but 2 weeks later he was in another relationship. Any way. I pray every morning for help letting go. Seems like it should be easy. You’re book and blogs helped me out of dark place I was in for awhile. I picked myself up I cry when I need to and I go on. But my heart still hurts. Just pray for me. Your blogs help so very much. Thank you

  49. March 28, 2014

    I loved no.10, it makes you remember why you shouldn’t dwell on the past but learn from it, why you should cherish the wonderful people in your life, whether it be friends or family, who help you get through tougher times and how blessed you are to have them and lastly, to always keep believing that there are are better things to come, even if you can’t see how yet… Just to keep believing… Because hope is priceless X thank you single woman! X

  50. Ngoni
    April 5, 2014

    “Though I had my future all mapped out, living a safe, normal existence….God had a different plan for my life. It is only in surrendering what we think our lives are supposed to be that we can step into everything they’re meant to be.”–Mandy Hale, Never Been To Vegas…..God has been teaching me about surrendering in a very big way. On March 24, I spent 4 hours in Scripture, talking with God. On March 25, I left my beloved position at the school district to pursue being a missionary. On March 26, I sold my car! (My family thinks I’ve lost it. No, I actually found it. My life, that is.) My friends and co-workers were visibly upset. To them, I told them that God called me and I answered. On April 3rd, I had a phone interview with an organization to do missionary work overseas. I am at peace with the decisions I’ve made. I don’t know where it’ll take me, but I trust that Jesus will take care of me. All my life, I’ve been planning what my life should look like. Being married, having children, working as a Physical Therapist. I thank you Mandy for this blog. I saw in myself and in my posts that I just need to let go. I am letting God take over the rest.

  51. Vuyokazi
    May 28, 2014

    The overthinking quote. I love it something about it that just speaks to me 🙂 makes me realise certain thinga about myself. How I mess up and think things aren’t going well for me. I guess overthinking isn’t an ideal practice to do, opportunities are lost within that state.

  52. Imee Martinez
    July 22, 2014

    I can relate to every item. I’ve met a few frogs that have taught me lessons about myself and love. When I look back I am glad that I did not ever settle. When I was younger, I have set very generic goals for myself: have a career, be rich, get married and have children. Now I have a career. I have money to support myself. But I haven’t met the man to build my dreams with. I used to worry about getting old alone and not having my own family but now I learned to accept that things doesn’t work the way you want them to. It gets lonely at times not to have a partner and I still hope that someone special will come soon while my skin isn’t that wrinkled yet (hihihi). But I will not spend the rest of my life waiting for prince charming may not come at all. I will keep on exploring new experiences and places, meet new friends along the way and just live a happy and fulfilled life. It’s much better to be an exploring single woman than spend a miserable lifetime with a toxic partner. 🙂

    Thanks for the inspiration you’re giving us “single women” 🙂

  53. Shala
    September 25, 2014

    It’s amazing how God works in our lives. I’ve followed The Single Woman on twitter for years and earlier this evening I retwitted one of the messages regarding the season is over but a lesson was learned. So for the past several months I’ve struggled with sleeping at night, because the man I’ve cared about for the past year has turned out to be a liar, cheat and immature. I understand the lesson learned from this season; however, it’s difficult learning to trust my own judgment now about others. So when I read #4 message and it finally hit me, Mandy you said it in such a way the light bulb moment happened. I MUST stop overthinking things and just live and let it be. I lose who I am in those thoughts and preconceived expectations and more importantly, if it’s not for me, I need to just get off the hamster wheel and walk away from it. In the case of my new Ex-boyfriend, I knew he didn’t care for me four months ago and even though I would ask questions, his actions didn’t mirror his responses. Therefore the longer I stayed the more I question, analyzed, and my insecurities grew. Well I finally woke up and said I’ll stop calling him and wait till he calls. It’s been weeks, he hasn’t called, so it’s over without any closure or ADULT conversation. Tonight sleeplessness led me to thinking about Fairy Tale lifestyles, which led me to here and I now feel soooooooooooo much better after reading the messages and comments. So I thank you all for your inspiring words. I will learn to open my heart and love again.

  54. October 7, 2014

    i love them all.. but sometimes i don’t know how to apply the things i learned to my latest situation… with a man who always melts my heart oh how can i resist him… everytime i’m trying to let go, that’s the time things turn the other way.. i usually get confused… i know in my heart that i truly love him but i just don’t know why things are like that..something that has a pattern but also unique at the same time….

  55. Tina
    November 21, 2014

    #10. I am almost 46 years old. I remember being a young woman and always wishing in the well for the “love of my life” . At 35 and alone I gave birth to my daughter, THE love of my life. Not my plan, but obviously God’s plan. I have a beautiful daughter, an amazing job that I love and a lot of caring friends and family. I have many great male friendships which, I believe, because I embrace my “single” life flourish without pressure. Make wishes, just realize that God will answer them in the way He knows is right for you!

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Something wonderful is on the horizon
Life doesn’t always look the way we want it to look. In Mandy’s upcoming book, Turn Toward the Sun: Releasing What If and Embracing What Is, you’ll find encouragement to live in the moment, sit with your experiences, and trust God with the unknown.
Preorder from Baker Book House for 40% off and free shipping!*
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Something wonderful is on the horizon
Turn Toward the Sun CoverLife doesn’t always look the way we want it to look. In Mandy’s upcoming book, Turn Toward the Sun: Releasing What If and Embracing What Is, you’ll find encouragement to live in the moment, sit with your experiences, and trust God with the unknown.
Preorder from Baker Book House for 40% off and free shipping!*
*US shipping only