The Single Woman’s Dash of Sass: Once a Cheater…

Quotes of the Day:

“Cheaters never prosper. (Because they suck.)” ~Greg Behrendt

“Cheating and lying aren’t struggles, they’re reasons to break up.” ~Patti Callahan Henry

The Single Woman Says:

I see you, married men. Men in relationships. Men who have updated your Facebook status with “In a Relationship” but forgot to update your hearts. Or your minds. Or your habits.

Over the past month or so, I have been either openly hit on or heavily flirted with by two married men and one man in a long-term, committed relationship. Now, obviously I didn’t reciprocate or show any interest whatsoever, but it struck me how the version of these guys’ marriages or relationships must be so different from that of their partner’s. Their trusting, unsuspecting partners. Does this paint a picture of the status of marriages? Well, a good deal of them. And as single women, we are often prey for men who are bored, lonely, and deceitful. It is vital, however, that we maintain our dignity and self-respect and avoid the pitfall of becoming “The Other Woman.” Just recently, I received an email from someone who was being wooed by a married man, asking me for advice. And I’ll tell you what I told her:

Don’t fall for it. Don’t convince yourself that you’re somehow different, or special, or his long-lost soulmate that he’s REALLY meant to be with. Don’t believe him when he says his wife is crazy, the marriage was over a long time ago, or he’s leaving tomorrow. And even if he DOES leave tomorrow…is that what you want for yourself? To be the woman a married man turned his back on his commitment for? Bottom line: If he cheats WITH you, he’ll cheat ON you. You can deny it, run from it, or tell me how wrong and stupid I am…but rarely does a man cheat just once. Like the old Lays potato chip ad “No one can eat just one,” when it comes to infidelity…no one can cheat just once.

You deserve to be the ONLY woman, not the OTHER woman. Not a secret, but a celebration. And not a down low relationship, but an up and up one. Be NO ONE’s dirty little secret. Remember, just like the hotel room you’re checking into under a fake name, that kind of relationship wasn’t built to last for more than one night.

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