The Single Woman’s Dash of Sass: You Have to Grieve It to Leave It

Quote of the Day:

“Grieving doesn’t make you imperfect. It makes you human.” ~Sarah Dessen

The Single Woman Says:

I think when we’re going through a loss of any kind, the tendency of the world and our friends and those around us is to tell us to “Buck up” and “Keep your chin up!” and “Dry those tears” and even “Don’t cry over anyone who wouldn’t cry over you!”

…But the truth is; it is healthy and necessary and even vital to grieve the loss of something or someone that mattered to you when it exits your life. You can’t truly heal from a loss until you allow yourself to really FEEL the loss…experience the pain…cry the tears that will cleanse your soul and water the seeds of your new beginning. I don’t think anyone should wallow in self pity and misery for extended periods of time…but it’s only normal once your world is shaken and someone you cared about is taken to give yourself some time to sit with the loss, allow it to wash over you and through you, accept the fact that they’re gone, then get up and get on with it. Don’t listen to anyone who tells you that you’re being “weak” when you are simply being human. Part of being strong is allowing yourself to be vulnerable, and to let down the walls, and to cry tears of sorrow before looking ahead to your new tomorrow.

At the end of the day – they mattered to you. You loved them. And even though you know they might not be the best thing for you, letting them go HURTS. You have every right to give yourself time to acknowledge their loss and come to terms with their absence in your life. You can’t TRULY leave it until you allow yourself to grieve it. Give yourself that time. Only then will you be ready to stand up, brush yourself off, and leave the past behind.


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