The Single Woman’s Dash of Sass: Life is Messy

Quote of the Day:

“Life is supposed to be messy. Being human means you will get our heart broken and your fingernails dirty.” ~Kaitlyn Jane Mauro

The Single Woman Says:

I got rather viciously attacked on Twitter yesterday by someone who has been posing as my “Twitter friend” for the past year or so, but evidently had been harboring some really harsh feelings about me. This guy has been following my personal Twitter page (@MissMandyHale) and he was pretty aggressively questioning me about my recent trip to NYC, in which I spent time with my Mr. Big. He asked me how I was planning to “spin” the story to my readers, to which I replied, “There’s no spin. I’ve always been honest about it. I’m learning as I go…just like everyone else. Never claimed to be a guru.” It then spiraled into him calling me a “hypocrite” (among other lovely sentiments) for spending time with a man who I have previously walked away from. To which I will now take this opportunity to respond, on behalf of not just myself, but my readers, who trust me and support me and believe in me.

If I was a “hypocrite,” I would be sitting back pretending to be perfect while watching all of you struggle with single life. I would ALWAYS make the right decisions and NEVER get it wrong and would wield my knowledge and relationship expertise with an iron fist…never admitting to being wrong, never stumbling and falling and getting back up, never turning left when I should have gone right. I would be unreachable, untouchable…and completely unrelatable.

The truth is – I’m not an expert, or a guru, or a counselor. I’m not perfect. I’m not even close. I speak to you through the lens of my life and the lessons I’m learning as I go along. I don’t have all the answers. But I’m brave enough to ask the questions. And I bring you along with me on the journey, sharing my heart with you and encouraging you as I encourage myself and hopefully inspiring you with my unwillingness to give up on my fierce believe in happy endings and Prince Charmings and fairytales. Everything I write about, every little 140 character encouragement I send to you guys every day comes straight from an honest, real, raw place. I tell you what I would tell my best girlfriend…my sister…MYSELF. When I encourage you to “walk away” or “kick a guy to the curb,” it’s because I’m struggling to do the same thing myself. Sometimes, yes…I kick a guy to the curb and he somehow finds his way back into my passenger’s seat. It has happened. I have my weak moments. I have my strong moments. But I will NEVER lie to you or mislead you or pretend to be perfect simply because to admit that I’m NOT invites criticism. I am only ME…a single girl who might love too much and forgive too quickly and give second and third and even fourth chances where they’re not deserved…but at least I can say I’m REAL. If I never made a bad decision or took a wrong turn, I wouldn’t have any knowledge or wisdom to share with you. I mean, who can relate to PERFECT? I am here, doing what I’m doing because my flaws pointed me to my cause…and I think you guys see that, respect that, and relate to that.

At the end of the day…I hope I can be that big sister or best friend or voice of encouragement to you as you walk the single girl walk…because I’m not just talkin’ it…I’m walkin’ it, right along with you. I’m here with you. I’m experiencing the incredible, beautiful, magic, tragic highs and lows of single life. We’re in this thing together. For every time you have stumbled, so have I. But the important thing is not how many times we’ve stumbled, but how many times we’ve GOTTEN BACK UP.

I will always get back up and try again, no matter what life throws at me. And if my messy, imperfect, flawed journey can give someone else the courage to walk their own with a little more sassiness, a little more bravery, a little more confidence…then that’s all that matters to me.


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